Small Ting!
A website I use daily recently changed the entire appearance of their platform. They actually have two platforms running concurrently, and I still use the old one. I decided to do a deep dive and figure out why I preferred the old platform, and I sent the company my findings, which turned out to be basically all related to neurodivergence; ease of use and appearance. When I relayed this to someone who also uses the platform (and knows WAY more than me), the comment was generally that it was not a big deal. One of the things I was complaining about was that the new platform sometimes had me doing an extra step for it to look like the old platform, which was throwing me off. The fonts, background colours, size of the font, the contrasts, how "busy" the page looks....there's a lot that gets noticed. What might seem like “small ting” to others might be HUGE for a neurodivergent person.
Let me explain. When I signed up for my Masters degree a few years ago, I bought myself a little notebook to take my notes. To go with a new pack of colourful pens I had. I bought the perfect notebook: a spiral A5 notebook with about 5 different sections - perfect for each different course I was taking. I got home EXCITED to start my learning! Except...when I opened the notebook, the pages were upside down (the main, dark red margin was on the opposite side of the spiral). I stared at this book for a bit because I instantly knew there was NO way I could write in it. Not even a scratch. It physically was not going to happen. Yet, I was excited! The laptop was already opened on my university page, ready for me to take my notes. I had the momentum. I had the enthusiasm. It was just this one “small ting” that stopped EVERYTHING. I proceeded to spend the next eternity of time unspiraling the entire notebook, flipping over the pages, and respiraling it until it looked “right”. It took a LONG time because sometimes I needed to do only a few pages at one time. It was not as easy as I thought it would be, but it was necessary for me to move forward with my plans. Had I not done that, the notebook would still be there, unused. A semester later, something similar happened: I couldn’t find/couldn’t remember the black ballpoint pen I had used to do the main writing. I had all the coloured pens (each one for a different category and sub category), but not the black one to write the body of text. This, naturally, meant I could not start my semester of learning until I had found it. It took me several days of searching, because I thought it was part of my pack of coloured pens. Eventually I remembered that the pack of coloured pens didn’t come with a black one, and I had used a different pen, so I went back to the first term's notes to analyse the ink, to find a pen that had a good feel to it when writing, that matched how I wanted it to look on the paper, before I could start ANYTHING. It wasn't just about any old pen, it had to be a specific pen that allowed me to write with the feel I wanted that would match the feel of the other pens. “Small ting” for someone who might think “a pen is a pen”. For me, that was the difference between getting started on important work, and getting stuck in a loop.
Executive function skills are those skills that help us do things like problem solve, decide what’s important and what is “small ting”, get started on a task, and not get sidetracked by other things. For a neurodivergent person, executive dysfunction can cause simple tasks to feel like mountains you have to climb, causing someone to shut down completely.
Grocery shopping. You go to the grocery and bring all the groceries inside, then put them away one time. Cold things in the fridge/freezer, everything else in their respective places. Simple right? Part of the routine. Not in my brain. Going to the grocery is a task in itself (that’s for another post), so by the time I get home, I’m already frayed. Then there are many stages between me getting home and being relaxed:
getting out of the car
opening the other door/trunk
taking out the groceries to move them on the step by the door (this might need a few trips)
opening the door (sometimes Mummy helps here)
taking the groceries inside (again, sometimes Mummy helps and might be done before I get inside)
putting down keys/wallet
immediate urge to wash my hands to wash off “outside”
and then to relax
Putting away the groceries is a different step made up of smaller steps because I have to go from fridge to freezer to cupboard, and there is a lot of figuring out to do. That is a big ask when I’m already overwhelmed from the grocery. So the cold things might get taken out, but the cupboard things tend to stay there until I have the capacity to do another set of steps.
The point is, “small ting” is not small ting when your executive function skills are stressed out and struggling!
As for the website and platform, I sent off what I hoped was not a harsh email, and received a great response that it will be forwarded to the necessary people. I will wait to see what will happen and if any changes will be taken into consideration, but until then, I am hanging on to the old platform until they discontinue it.
If you want to know the ins and outs of executive function skills and how much of a role they play in everyday life, we have a webinar for you to check out!
Comments