I Screen, You Screen, We All Screen

Let’s talk about screens! I know, I know, a broken record. As a parent, you’ve probably heard it enough: get your child off the screens! Yes, I fully support this, but let me add another aspect to it: how it changes behaviour.

Story time. I went to my nephew’s football practice a couple of months ago (in the States, so we’re talking American football here.) I noticed this little girl in a stroller close to me, maybe about 18 months old. The child had her tablet close to her face, she looked zoned out, and wasn’t responding to much that was going on around her. It caught my eye because the tablet was so close to her face that I doubt she could have seen anything around her even if she wanted to, and because of how out of it she looked. For time context, this was early evening, around sunset. Immediately I thought of how much there was to see around her that she was missing out on (it’s a giant sports complex where lots of teams were playing at the same time, with other small children running around). Anyway, cut to a few days later, my nephew had a football game. It was around the same time of day and my family and I were in the stands. I saw a few people pass by with a girl in a stroller, and she was looking out at the game and the people in the stands, very observant and animated. No screen in sight. I thought back to the first child and made a loose comparison as the two children looked to be the same age, yet the differences in behaviour with screen and without were so vast. A little while later after picking up some other content clues, I realised that it was the same little girl!!!! I was so amazed that this animated, lively girl was the same one who’d had the screen almost to her eyeballs a few days before, and the difference in how she presented. Yes I know, this is a general statement because there could have been so many other influences, but I still feel like it cannot be ignored! It simply made me think of how different the interactions and observations can be in the moment, and how much “richer” the learning is when it’s real time.

This is reinforced at work when I observe a little child in our waiting area from time to time. I’ve gotten good at determining whether or not the child is using a screen in the waiting room just based on vocalisations and behaviours. 100% of the time I’ve been spot on. When the screen is not in use, the child is engaged with people, observant, and…quieter? Calmer? There’s a difference. With the screen is in use, there’s an immediate energy shift that’s accompanied by louder vocalisations, some specific behaviours, and complete zoning out of everyone in the same space. This can also be regulating for this child, so I’m not saying good or bad, I’m just saying there is a clear difference.

For yourself and your family, take a closer look at how screens influence behaviour and maybe even mood. Screens can be great for regulating, but it is necessary to have other non-screen ways as well. Screens can be excellent for teaching and learning, but let’s not forget learning that can happen in real life and the real world. Screens can be useful for communication, but communication is a two-way street that requires reciprocation and observation.

Screens DO have an impact on all of us. As adults, we may be in better control of how we regulate ourselves and our usage. For children and their development, let’s ensure that MOST of their interactions and learning come from real life, real people, real places, with which they live and function.